Are You Following A Script? By Nick Davies

22.02.18

Are You Following A Script?

Some people have life scripts (a lot of the time they are unaware of) which they play over and over in their lives causing them pain or discomfort. You may have noticed a friend or colleague saying something like “I’ve met someone new, this time it’ll be different!” and find yourself thinking “Where have I heard this before!” and before too long when things go awry, they’ll say “Why does it always happen to me?”

When we are growing up we formulate understandings of patterns of behaviour in order to help us cope and survive in our world that we live in. Sometimes these understandings are influenced, both positively and negatively, by parents, teachers, or other people in a position of perceived authority.

The more significant and emotional the event, the more likely this event is to impact on our adult life if we continue to follow the pattern. In the example I used earlier, the person may have felt proud about achieving something as a child and after seeing one of her friends be shown positive attention, gone to seek recognition from a significant adult. However on this occasion the adult scalded them for bothering them which was not the result the child expected, thus leaving them feeling rejected and confused.

If the child experiences this outcome on other significant emotional occasions it may make an incorrect assumption that nobody loves them or no matter what they do they’ll never be good enough, thus forming their negative life script.

Once a life script or pattern of behaviour is formed, the person’s unconscious mind will look to replay this pattern each time incorrectly thinking that this is the outcome the person wants. This is why some people manage (unconsciously) to find those people or situation.

Fortunately the unconscious mind can be encouraged to change and re-educate itself with new information and learning once you have identified this and with the help of some forms of therapy.

Take care,

Nick

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